"Who gave them the right..." - Edouard Kock

What is it about people thinking they can analyze someone else? Who in 
the hell gave them the right to claim intellectual superiority of a 
situation just because they think they have you figured out. 

I am not smart. Academically, I've always been at the bottom. I don't 
excel at anything. And although some people might think that Im good at 
something, that view is a little biased due to their lack of knowlage. 
Just because they don't know how to do it, they assume that it takes 
talent or effort. Its the old "magic" analogy. How did the people of 
centuries ago explain static electricity? The fact that a bit of cloth 
clung to their coats were attributed to magic or demons. But was it? 
Today's society doesn't think so.

What defines "smart" or "stupid"? The old stereotypes of someone wearing 
glasses, using big words and generally being educated, being smart, and 
the neandrathalic dope who's only word is "duh", as stupid? Im starting to 
think that somewhere along the lines, we got them the wrong way around. I 
cannot convince anyone that Im stupid (except people who don't like me, 
they seem to be easy to convince.). But yet, I cannot seem to convince 
anyone that I am what you might call, intelligent. Then Im average, right? 
My outspoken friend informed me that there is NO average. Fine. Then what 
in the name of Drak am I? Mediocre? What defines me as a person, when it 
comes to guaging me against someone else? I know that someone would comment 
that its stupid to try and prove yourself better than someone else. But 
lets say that you had to prove yourself against someone else, to get a job. 
Naturally, you would prove you have better skills, right? Fine, but what 
if you don't have better skills? Are you an idiot then? Im not sure... 

"They are them, and you are you." 

Yes. Thats a rather obivious observation. But lets look a little deeper 
at it, as someone intended me to. (What ever happend to the day of just 
SAYING it, instead of hiding it in riddles and rhetoric?) You cannot 
change someone else, and they cannot change you. Well, actually thats 
bullshit. If you could not change someone else, then what do teachers 
do? What does school do? It doesn't educate, it changes. Or are they the 
same thing? Ah, who cares. All I know is, I was better off before I went 
to school. When I still had all my creativity and strength that is 
localized to kids. Some lamers might then argue that "Yeah, you fuckhead. 
You are just a stupid fag because you LET them change you!". Does anyone 
who goes to school have a choice? Yes. Go willingly, get forced, or get 
kicked out of the house. Which would you chose? (And don't bother mailing 
me saying "Yeh, I would rather get kicked out of the house than go to 
school!" or something fucked up like that. You know as well as I do, you 
wouldn't. 

Im not smart. Im not smart, and I HATE it when people try to convince me 
otherwise! Im HAPPY not being smart, but Im unhappy when people think that 
just because I think Im not smart, Im the one who is causing me not to be 
smart. Sure. Some people have been convinced that they could fly. The 
ground convinced them otherwise. Just because you think that you are 
something, doesn't ALWAYS mean that you will be. Sure, some people might 
eventaully believe themselves. But what if you are already right? What is 
there to believe, except the facts?

Im tired of being told "you should stop saying how stupid you are". What is 
wrong with just wanting to be who I am, and make the most of it? I don't MIND 
being stupid. I can live my life the way I want to, even though Im not 
intelligent or educated. But no, some people try to make you more than you 
are, without realizing that they are totally wrong about you. I dunno where 
some people get their self-righteousness when it comes to trying to give 
someone else advice. I don't know of ANYONE who doesn't need some of his/her 
own advice. If you arn't even capable of helping yourself, who gave you the 
right to help someone else?

Sigh. At least one good thing comes of ranting like this. It helps relieve 
tension. Im sure that a certain two people are very pissed off at me right 
now, for acting like a "self-righteous bastard". Ironic that its okay for 
some people to preach and pretend like the know everything just because they 
went to a good school, got taught interesting things like calculus and physics 
and geography and so fourth, but its not okay for me to speak whats on my mind. 
And I hate it when I DO speak my mind, because I believe that I should, and then 
get my thoughts analyzed by someone who doesn't have a CLUE what its like to 
be me! I don't anlalyze (I try not to, but its not easy) other people, because 
I myself don't want to be. And now I know that someone must be thinking right 
now that Im talking about him, but no, Im not JUST talking about you. Im talking 
about friends, parents, society.

Is green the same colour for you, as it is for me? What IS green? For all I know, 
what I see as green, someone else sees as purple. And yet, we go through life 
not caring HOW other people see things, because our views are the ones that 
are true. What WE know, and see, is true. What I see when I look around, the 
things and people, is true. But to others, its not. I cannot change that. I 
accepted that a long time ago, after people started looking at me strangely, 
telling me that Im insane and stupid, or "have to much imagination." I take 
an example of a picture with random ink blotches on it. I look at it, and 
see a bunny. You look at it, and you might not see the bunny, you see a lion. 
Which one of us is right? 

I ponder the validity of what I see. How can I not? Is it natural for people 
to grow up, accepting the views of the people who educate you? Because your 
parents teach you from the day you are born, that a small feline fuzzy thing 
is a cat, IS it a cat? They learned it from their parents, and theirs from 
theirs. Where did it start? Did someone sit down and note "That, is a CAT!" 
and thus the education of the known world is born? I don't think so. What 
if you saw something, and asked your parents what it is, and your parents 
couldn't tell you? What then? I think that most people would just shrug and 
then ignore the thing that doesn't have a name. I think that I didn't. I 
stayed interested in that which my parents did not know. Or was it, they 
they did not see? 

Im not smart. But I never said that I don't understand things. Spending my 
entire life trying to understand things, much have left me lacking the 
skills to actually explain them to others, but I don't care. Or at least, 
not until someone thinks they understand me.

"Who gave man the right to think he can understand another, when he himself 
is lacking knowlage about his own being?" - Ed