Chapter 13: The Quick Nap Of The Drugged


It was night. The full moon illuminated the grassy top of the knoll on
which Frankie sat. He could feel the soft and yielding grass against his
bare feet. The grass was damp from the rain that fell earlier in the
day. His sister, Freda, was sitting on the grass next to him. He held
her hand as they watched the stars twinkling and sparkling in the dark
sky above. A shooting star streaked towards the horizon. "Make a wish"
said Freda. Frankie thought for a moment and then he knew what he
wanted.

As Frankie came to, his first impression was a feeling of being jostled
and bumped around but in a gentle manner. He heard the low pitched growl
of an engine, perhaps of a truck. Frankie opened his eyes. The first
thing he saw was the fabric on the ceiling of the vehicle. He was
apparently riding shotgun with his head tilted back over the headrest.
Frankie turned his head forward and looked out the front window. He was
riding high over the road through what he recognized as Middletown. He
was in some kind of a truck. The seat was a dark red leather. The
passenger side window was all the way up but a corner of it had been
chipped off so that a blast of cold autumn air was rushing in. A small
fuzzy baseball was hanging from the rear view mirror. He turned to the
driver's side and there, expertly handling the steering wheel, sat
Martin.

"Ah, cutie pie. I see you have joined the land of the conscious." said
Martin. He winked.

Frankie blinked. "Uhh... what happened? I was in the underground lab and
then...?"

Martin nodded and raised a hand in a slow down there gesture. He said
"First, I think I should explain who I am and how we got here. From the
top." He smiled. "I'm Martin P.I. Private investigator, that is. And
also a licensed tow truck operator for the extra dough."

Frankie took a look out the back window. Indeed his car was hanging to
the back of the truck. Frankie said "Egads. I hope you used chains and
not a hook. Saturns do not take hooks very well."

"Oh don't worry. Trust me. I know what I'm doing." said Martin, rolling
his eyes a little. "Yes, I did use the chains. And this tow is on the
house, by the way."

Frankie nodded. "Okay then. So about your story?"

Martin said "Okay. I've been investigating this secret group in my spare
time."

Frankie interjected with a smirk. "Oh, so you have a hobby."

Martin nodded. "Yeah. The group is actually RREOFP or Red Rooster
Experimenting On Ferret People. Apparently, they are devoted to finding
new and bizarre uses for ferret folks but they are doing so in pretty
nefarious ways. Not that the premise was at all ethical to begin with."

"The creeps" said Frankie, shaking his head ever so slightly.

Martin continued, "Anyway, I noticed that you were going into several of
the group's locations that I've been staking out. You went into Lace 'n
Love, the secret offices of their operative Smith the snake. Then you
went to the Red Rooster Drive In and then to the cave in the woods
behind the Red Rooster Drive In. That's one of their secret lab
locations. So I figured either you're another investigator like me, but
one foolhardy enough to dash into a fortified and booby trapped secret
lab, or you knew something. So I tracked you down to The Tollbooth."

Frankie nodded.

"When I told the bartender to make The Monkey Hop with love, that was
my cue to him to add the truth serum. I wanted to find out what you
knew about the Red Rooster." explained Martin.

Frankie said "Oh, so it was you. What gives you the right..."

"All part of a detective's work." said Martin. "The problem is either
the drink or the truth serum appeared to have too much of an effect on
you because you fainted and passed out cold. Then I took you back to my
apartment in the Upper East Side via the subway. Put you to bed. You
looked so comfortable there. Then I checked your pockets and found the
note with the address in Middletown and that's how I got to the silo."

The truck rumbled and rattled its way through the streets of Middletown.
Martin flipped the signal switch and turned his steering wheel ever so
slightly to change lanes.

"Okay" Frankie was curious. "So what happened next?"

"Well... I saw your car parked on the street so I knew you had gone in."
Martin continued.

"Wait a minute... how did you know it was my car?" asked Frankie.

"Umm... a good private investigator never reveals his secrets?" joked
Martin.

Frankie glared at him.

Martin explained "Okay okay... well, the car had way too many Ferret
Power bumper stickers and decals on the back. You're a big fan of the
band, aren't you? You were wearing a Ferret Power T-shirt at the bar.
When I brought you back home, I noticed that even your underwear had
Ferret Power logos on it. Oh, by the way, you looked simply adorable in
those briefs."

Frankie was looking down to the floor, holding his head in his hands. "I
am not gay" he said softly, shaking his head a little.

Martin sighed. "Why do I have such problems with people not coming out
to me?"

Frankie was still holding his head in his hands. "So what happened
next?" he said to the floor.

"Well, I went around to the back of the silo and found the steps leading
down. Apparently someone had tripped all the booby traps because the
stone tiles in the wall were all open. So I went down the stone
passageway and to the room at the end of the passageway. I hid behind
the doorway and watched from outside. Saw you trash the lion and the
tiger and the two golden retrievers. Those were some pretty slick moves
you got there, Mr. Ferret Power." said Martin.

"Thanks" said Frankie.

"Anyway, you seemed to have taken care of the lion, the tiger and the
two dogs. And you were about to fire your big gun at the Red Rooster
when something happened. You dropped your gun and just started
staring across the room with a dazed expression. Then the lion came
up behind you. He whacked you on the neck and you fell to the floor."
said Martin.

"Oh so it was the lion who did that to me. He looked like a badger at
the time." said Frankie.

"Badger? Well, the Red Rooster went over to you and it was going to
pound you to pulp with an aluminum baseball bat. So that was when I had
to take action. I fired a few shots into the room but the Red Rooster
and gang returned fire. I was outgunned and I could not dodge bullets
the way you did. They managed to escape through the opposite doorway
with your sister in tow. They left you behind in the room though," said
Martin, continuing his narration.

"Well, about my staring into the distance and dropping the gun..." said
Frankie. "There is this implant at the back of my neck."

Frankie pointed to the rectangular lump at the back of his neck. A bit
of the fur on his neck had come off in the scuffle, making the outline
of the implant a bit easier to see.

"I don't know when I started having this implant but it was from a
very early age, way before my sister was kidnapped even. I think it
has something to do with the hallucinations I have been having. Back
in the room, the Red Rooster was carrying some sort of device."
continued Frankie. "I saw him push a button on that device and suddenly
the implant started tingling and burning. Then it must have triggered a
hallucination because all I saw after that were badgers. Badgers all
over the room. The gun became a badger and so I dropped it."

Martin steered the tow truck onto the ramp going up to Interstate 86. He
heard a honk emanating from a light truck following somewhere behind the
tow truck.

"Damn Orange County people thinking that they are New Yorkers. I have
had the turn signal on for one block already" groused Martin. He got
back onto the subject, "Oh, so that's why you fainted. And you were so
close to offing the Red Rooster and rescuing your sister too. Tough
break, kiddo."

"I think something on the darts in the stone passageway may have
contributed to that," said Frankie. "I pulled out one dart from my leg
after my mad dash down the stone passageway. The stone passageway
had a booby trap that fired darts from the walls when I stepped on
some of the stone tiles along the way. There is probably some kind of
drug on there but I got hit by only one dart so the dosage may not have
been too high."

Martin nodded. The truck rumbled at top speed down the Interstate past
the green fields and farms.

Martin was curious. "By the way, how do you dodge bullets and glide
through the air so quickly? That was amazing."

Frankie said, "Well, a few years back, a shady character in a trenchcoat
and dark glasses came around to my place and gave me a red pill. I was
stupid and took pills from strangers all the time back then. But since I
took that pill, I got hyperspeed. I can basically move around really
quickly and dodge bullets almost without thinking about it. It happens
only some of the time though. I don't know what triggers that effect. So
the red pill gives me wings!"

"Oh hehe," chuckled Martin. He stopped chuckling and said, "Oh hey, you
may need this item again." He reached under his seat and pulled out
Frankie's large gun with the white pearl handle. He held it out to
Frankie.

Frankie took the gun and replaced it in his leather holster. "Oh
thanks. I knew I dropped that somewhere," he smirked. He thought
of something. "Um... do you know how I can get this implant removed?"
Frankie pointed again at the back of his neck. "I don't want to start
seeing those pesky badgers again the next time I fight the Red Rooster."

"Hmm..." Martin pondered for a while. Then he nodded. "I know just the
place," he declared.

He slowed the tow truck down at the tollbooth entering the New York
Thruway. After the electronic toll collection system confirmed the paid
toll on a LED screen, he revved up the truck again and steered it onto
the ramp and then onto the Thruway heading to the South. The tow truck
rumbled its way back towards the city.