DIARY.TXT - May 13, 1999

Dear Diary
By SwampRat
(cl) 1999 Gay Furry Association


This is based on what I felt after reading some excerpts of what Colin is
working on. I can only Hope to be that good someday..

                             * * * *

Diary - I met someone. Someone handsome and warm and so Sexy.. My heart was his
in the blink of an eye. It didn't matter that we are completely incompatible,
that loving him is not only impossible but wrong,.. I still do.

Diary - He waved to me in the corridor! He said Hi! I have no idea how I
managed to stay composed enough to say hello back.. I was never so glad in my
Life to see the familiar door to my room. My heart is still pounding, I am
sweaty and breathless. No doubt about it - It's love..

Diary - A bump.. Casual contact in a crowded space but More than enough to make
me want him all the more. To feel those hands on me. To touch him.. I am going
Mad trying to find ways of testing him.. Dare I hope he might find me
attractive?

Diary - I blew it! We were just sitting and chatting... And I let slip I was
thinking about him.. As soon as I saw the eyebrows raise I knew I blew it. I
covered up pretty well, but now I think he knows I see him as more than just a
crew-member. More than a friend.

Diary - By the Creator Gods I have never been so happy.. We were again sitting
at the same booth chatting.. He reached under and Squeezed my hand! Said in a
low, quiet voice he had been thinking of me too! My hand is shaking too much to
write anymore..

Diary - We did it! It was nothing more than a quick kiss and an intimate hug
but we touched bodies.. Tomorrow he says he will try and stop by on some
excuse. Maybe we can talk and hold hands and such... Dare I hope it will come
true? 

Diary - He is sleeping in my bed. He looks so beautiful I want to touch him
even now. He Did come over and we Did talk.. Then we kissed and hugged and the
clothes came off... Now we are bonded in ways I could only Dream about before.
Ah.. He stirs and calls my name. *Sigh* It is so wonderful to be in Love.

Diary - It's out. The relationship - Me, Him.. But I don't care. What can they
do - Kick me out off the ship, space me? I have known love and given love and
Nothing they do can take that away from me. He says we are 2 foolish children..
What can We do about the way thing are? I don't know, but I am not backing
down. Not even if my Family disowns me.. I love him. He loves me. That fact
will outlast all the Politics and Stupidity.. Even Past death, When it comes to
take us. 

                             * * * *

The hani closes the book, locking it and placing it in a drawer, which is also
locked. Cleans up the tear-tracks in the brown fur, and dresses.. Runs a clawed
finger over the picture of a Human, with the inscription, 'Love You Always',
then sighs and goes out to face the day and whatever jeers the other crew may
toss.. 'If only we were not both male..' he thinks, then shoves the thought
away as it insults both himself And his love. Speaking of which.. The man walks
to the feline and hugs him, both delighting and dismaying the male by kissing
him in public. Then hand in hand, they walk toward whatever fate has in store
for them.

The End