Silver’s Path
Written by Fixer SpeedStar
Silver’s Path
I howled into the night, still searching for her. I still cling to the hope she is still out there somewhere. “Come on, answer!” I growled. I ran further in the hopes that maybe one day, she will be in listening distance.
The snow crunched under my feet as I ran. It was so cold out, but I was able to keep warm by wearing some furs I collected from my kills in addition to my own coat.
“ARROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-RAOOOOOW!” I howled as I stood up on the rock pile. Still no response, but what could I expect, it’s been years…
My name is Sliver, I’m a wolf morph if you haven’t guessed by now, well okay I’m half wolf, but I’m not sure what my father was. I got my name from my silvery fur and my gray eyes. I have no pack, at least not any more… not after they came.
Before I was born, our pack was the dominant one in this territory. But then they came and started a town out here. We wolves are considered savage to them because we rejected civilization. It’s not truly living… not to us anyway. We were chased off and several were killed. That’s how I came to be, when my mother was captured… N-never mind.
We stayed far from the town, and that’s how we survived, it didn’t matter, none of our prey would go near that place, but still the loss the pack members still weighed heavily. I was only just born then so of course I knew nothing about it.
One day, years later, my mother took me out for hunting practice. I chased my prey around for so long and in the end finally caught a rabbit and tasted the blood of my fresh kill. I was so happy but also exhausted. My proud mother had to carry me home. I fell asleep in her arms.
The horrors I woke to still haunt me to this day. Can you imagine being so young and to wake up and find your entire pack… all dead or dying. It hurt me so bad inside I couldn’t stand it. I dropped to my knees and prayed for it all to be a dream. But then someone called out my name.
“Silver…”
“Dad?” I called our and ran to my alpha’s side.
“Silver… my son… Terror clan came… they…” He paused as he suddenly coughed up blood. They had stabbed him in the back. He was dying. “Silver… I have to tell you the truth… I’m not your father. I cared for you and raised you like my own, even if they considered me weak for it… You might not be mine by blood but you are mine by spirit… Your father… your real father… he wasn’t a wolf… he was from the town dwellers… I know it might sound hard or wrong… but you must find him… He will take care of you. I promise…” He said as he slumped onto the ground.
“You’re my father! Not some dog who put his seed in my mother.” I whimpered. “Dad… please don’t go!” I begged.
“I have to little one… to run on the winds… you’re mother is still… try to find her with your howl… she… she led them away to keep you safe…” He hacked and coughed. He wasn’t long for this world.
“Dad, please…” I cried as I wrapped my arms around him. He was growing cold.
“Silver… the spirit of our ancestors is strong in you… make me proud… son.” He said as he drifted off the mortal coil.
The tears stung at my face in the cold weather. I threw my head back and
howled. When I emptied my lungs, I took a deep breath and howled again. “Dad…”
I cried.
I looked around and the blood stained snow. It was a horrifying sight. I howled out my pain and sorrow one last time before I looked around. “Momma!” I shouted and began my search for her.
It seemed like an eternity since then I’ve stalked Terror clan since then as a rogue wolf. My body is covered with battle scars from all the times I had to fight off defenders of other packs and injuries from the hunt. It’s been so long but finally I’ve come back to the spot where it all happened. I guess I avoided it all this time. I could still see all the blood in my mind. I slept in out old pack lands that night. The cave where I was born was still there, and it made a good shelter for the night, though it wasn’t nearly as big as I remember. I cried myself to sleep as the memories rushed back. Tomorrow I continue my search for her.
Bright and early I was up and out howling. I left some of my furs behind, I won’t need much since it’s not as cold as it is further north here. I ran out and began my search once again. I constantly had doubts, but I promised my dad that I would find my mother, and I will find her.
I searched the entire day, only stopping to kill and eat. I growled as something came up behind me as I ate.
“Easy, I’m not your enemy.” I heard the voice of a fox.
“Fine, what do you want?” I asked.
“Would you be willing to share your kill?” He asked.
“Why would I do that? What would it get me?” I growled and tore off a fresh piece of meat.
“Well I’ve been watching you, and it seems that you’re looking for something, or someone… perhaps I can help.” He offered. I still didn’t bother to turn.
“I am looking for my mother, but I’ve spent years trying to find her. What makes you thing you’ll be of any help?” I snarled as he drew closer.
“You’re mother? Warm voice? Fur a bit like yours? Caring female?” He asked.
“Y-you know her?” I asked and turned around.
“Yes, follow me.” He said. I picked up the small carcass and followed behind the fox. He twisted through the forest for some time. I was getting uncomfortable with the increase of scents from the town’s nearby outpost.
“Here.” He finally announced.
“Huh?” I asked as we stopped.
“She left a scent mark here a while ago, it might be feint but try to see if you recognize it.” He said. I sniffed at the tree.
“I don’t smell anything… except your scent- Whoa!” I shouted as the fox pushed me.
SNAP! THUNK! YELP!
I howled in pain as the leg trap closed around my ankle, breaking the bone and driving the few metal teeth deep into my leg. Like a snare trap, the metal jaws around me foot suddenly lifted off the ground and knocked me onto my back. The pain was unbearable. I howled uncontrollably.
“Those trappers in town are inventive aren’t they? The trap gets them, and then it pulls the trapped limb up so the animal can’t bite its leg off.” He laughed as I screamed and tried to reach up for the trap, but it only pained me more.
“Help me please!” I whimpered through yelps of pain.
“Why should I help, I have what I want now.” The fox laughed and began eating the freshly killed animal I had brought here. He ate it right in front of me, ignoring my please for help the entire time. Finally just to spite me, he marked me with his scent.
“Well, I’ve eaten my fill, goodbye little wolf.” The fox laughed and began walking away.
“W-wait, what about my mother!” I shouted through the haze of pain.
“Oh, I have no idea. I just gave a general description and you fell for it.” The fox laughed as he walked away.
Three hours later the sun set. I’m still hanging in the trap panting from the pain. My back was pressed down against the cold ground. The smell on the wind let me know it would snow soon. This was very bad.
Day one
What had I done to deserve this?
I’m so cold… I can hardly feel my own body anymore as my soaked body lies in
the snow. I was so cold, and the only part of me that wasn’t numb was my leg.
The pain was getting worse and the wound now burned. The rusty metal trap still
dug into my broken limb. I howled constantly trying to find help of any kind,
even if it is Terror clan and they’ll kill me. Death is better then this
torment.
“Help me!” I screamed for any non-wolves aid. I couldn’t take it anymore. I prayed for death. “Please, set me free or kill me, I can’t stand this. Please, show mercy.” I whimpered up to the night stars.
Day three
I’m so cold… so hungry… I want to go home… but I don’t have a home. I want to go somewhere where I’ll be warm and safe. My wounds were getting infected and it felt like it was on fire.
My mind spun a warm and safe place for me. It was a nice cave, with a fire for warmth. My mother lay over a few feet away, and next to me was a female and our pups. A fire warmed all our bones and cast some light. This was what I wanted. I wanted a family. I wanted someone to be with. I’m tired of being alone.
I growled as I lashed out at my trapped leg. “DAMMIT!” I growled as I flailed at it, frantically trying to either rip my foot off or break the trap. My claws bored some pretty deep wounds into my leg. I yelped and cried. “Help!” I went back to yelling once I gave up. Why hasn’t anyone come to check the trap?
Day five
I felt so weak. The blood had stained and matted the fur all over my leg. I was so dirty and pained. Everything hurt, and now I was getting very sick. I couldn’t sit up to continued my vicious assaults on the trap. “Please, great spirit, deliver me from this. Free me…” I cried out. Why would the great spirit help me now? Where was it when my pack was killed? In the years I’ve been searching for my mother?
I watched the stars above me. Tomorrow the moon would be full. It gave me some comfort that I will be able to see the beautiful sphere one last time. I knew I could hold out one more day.
Day eight
I’ve been praying and struggling since I woke that morning. “Great wolf, great mother, great spirit, please free me from…” Then it hit me, I would get no response. I looked up into the full moon. “WHY WON’T YOU ANSWER ME?”
“Have faith.” A voice called. I looked around but could find nobody. Then I saw him. It was him, my father, the one who raised me, and died back in that clearing.
“Please… help me, father!” I cried and reached for him. He didn’t move toward me, though looked down at my paw.
“I will not.” He said quite calmly.
I felt my heart rip in half. “Please… dad… my entire pack has been killed, I’ve never been able to find my mother, and now I’m going to die here. Please, show mercy.” I begged.
“No. Silver, the way of the wolf is the strong survive. Do not give up. Be strong. Are you?” He asked.
What kind of question was that? “No, I’ve been here to long I lost my strength.” I said and dropped my paw.
“Physical strength is nothing compared to the strength of the wolf spirit. Are you strong?” She asked.
I remembered my father’s last words. ‘Silver, the spirit of our ancestors is strong in you, make me proud’
“Yes.” I said.
“Say it!” He yelled.
“I am strong.” I said weakly.
“Shout it!” He growled.
“I am strong!” I yelled.
“Howl it up to the moon!” He yelled.
“I AM STRONG!” I howled into the cold night until my lungs burned.
“Again!” He growled.
“I- I can’t.” I said.
“Of course you can, you’re my son! Now do it!” He growled.
“I AM STRONG!” I howled again my song boomed through the night.
Day twelve
“I… a-am… st-st-strong.” I shiver-growled, I couldn’t tell the difference.
“I AM strong!” I shouted. I’ve been chanting since I saw my father. I AM strong and I WILL get out of this. My voice has is horse and it felt like I was swallowing a cactus every time I breathed, but body is fading, and I intend to keep myself strong for as long as possible, as little time as I had left.
“I am strong! I am strong!” I chanted. I’ve since lost touch with reality so I didn’t realize how stupid this must look.
I howled with all I had in me, and then I could make no more noise. Not a single whine escaped my throat. My strength was gone. This was it, I’m done… I couldn’t move my body at all. Though I was so numb all over from the cold, with only my fur to keep me warm, I wouldn’t be able to tell if I was moving or not. I could hardly draw in the icy air to breathe.
This was it… as short and painful as it was… its over. I’m sorry dad, I couldn’t make you proud.
I could hear something… paws crunching in the snow. I forced my eyes open to see the blurry figure next to me. It bent down next to me, and I could make out blurry white fur. The great mother wolf spirit had answered my prayers. I was free, she sent an angel to take me to be with my dad.
Something cold was put to my lips, and the I felt the cascade of fresh water move down my throat. It was heavenly compared to the snow I’ve been eating. I felt the fire in my throat cool. “Are you an angel?” I asked clearly. I didn’t hear a response, but the figure hesitated.
I felt my leg being grabbed. It hurt so badly. I felt so much pain, but suddenly the burden of the pull from the rope was gone. I watched the explosion of blood and infectious fluids pour from my wounds as the trap shot up toward the tree branches. That was too much and I passed out.
Early the next morning
I wasn’t sure where I was. I was still so hungry I could swear my stomach had turned inside out. It felt so good with my leg out of that trap. I opened my eyes to find I was now inside a cave with a fire burning nearby. I winced in pain as I moved, and gave up on exploring. Someone had splinted my leg, not only that but reset the bone.
“Don’t move… you’ll only hurt yourself.” I heard a feminine voice say, full of concern. I turned my head to see a female white wolf standing at the mouth of the cave. I watched her carry in a small carcass from outside. I noticed the little bit of blood left on her muzzle. I watched her pull a knife and began hacking off small chunks of meat.
“Please, eat.” She said and knelt next to me, I noticed that she never quite looked right at me. I didn’t need to be told twice about food however and gladly ate what she offered me.
“How long has it been since you last ate?” She asked as I devoured the food she slipped into my mouth.
“I lost track… almost two weeks I think.” I said as I tried to count the days.
“You were stuck in the trap for two week?” She said with nothing but pity in her voice.
“Almost… it was hell.” I said. I’m going to kill that fox if I see him again.
“Well, I’m sorry to imprison you again, but from the looks of it you won’t be able to walk for a while.” She said and motioned behind her with her paw. Still she wouldn’t look at me.
“I can live with that.” I said. I remembered my hallucination of the home I wanted. She looked a lot like the female in my dream. “W-what’s your name?” I asked.
“
“
“Please… don’t call me beautiful.” She said as a saddened look crept across her face.
“But you are, I thought you were an angel when you freed me.” I said with a kind smile. She really was beautiful.
“I know, I remember hearing you… but someone else used to call me beautiful… and they really hurt me.” She said as she turned to look me in the eye.
I saw now what she was trying to hide. There was a hideous tear down the other side of her face. It wasn’t that bad, I was more disturbed by the thought of someone doing that to her.
“
“
“You would have died if I left you. I heard you howling and shouting, ‘I am strong.’ And… I don’t know, I just had to respect you for that. I mean, you knew you were in a totally vulnerable position that would have had alpha’s walk away with their tail between their legs… Can you tell me why you were doing that?” She questioned a little hesitantly.
“Well, when I was fairly young, my pack was attacked by
Terror clan. I found my dad dying, and he told me, that my real father wasn’t a
wolf at all, yet the spirit of the wolf is strong in me. My mother lured the
hunters from where she hid me, and I haven’t seen her since. I know she’s still
alive somewhere, and I’ve been looking since. But
still, since that day, I’ve been alone. When I was out there, I prayed for the
great wolf spirit to save me. For days I prayed, and when I finally gave up my
dad appeared. He helped me find the inner strength I needed to survive.” I said
and cried quietly from the memories.
“Oh… Silver…” She said and the quieted. I could tell there was something on her mind but she didn’t speak.
“What’s wrong
The next week
I had regained much of my strength. Dad, you really saved me
out there.
The next day.
I watched
“What!” She almost screamed.
”Whoa, easy,” I said calmly, “
She hated me… I told her I was a half-breed and now she hates me. Who could blame her? Nobody can stand a mutt like me. That had to be it, there was no other explanation. I watched her run out of the cave and I cursed myself.
“
I felt her kneel next to me. She laid down right behind me, and I could feel her cry. “Why are you crying, it’s my fault for being born a half-breed.” Is said coldly.
“What?” She sobbed.
“Well that is why you look at me like it makes you sick, isn’t it. I’m a half-breed, and inferior.” I said shifted away from her.
I felt her move away and I heard her crying. “It’s not that. It’s because I’m from Terror clan!” She cried and ran out of the cave.
I looked back toward the cave entrance. “Oh great mother.” I said and slapped myself on the forehead.
The female who freed me, saved my life, licked my wounds, and cleaned me up, is from the pack I’ve been stalking for the majority of my life.
12 hours later
I was sleeping when
Yet another week later
“Hold it.” I called out as
“Please
She started crying again. I sat up as she fell to her knees and pulled her into my arms. “It’s okay to cry. It doesn’t make you weak.” I said as I felt her return the embrace.
“Please… tell me about it.” I said. This obviously was bothering her very much. The poor girl, she hurt so bad inside.
“Two years ago, I grew old enough to bear cubs. The first beta wanted me, but… I despised him. The alphas stole from other packs, and even though everyone told me it was right, and ‘the way of the wolf’ it just felt wrong to me. And this beta was particularly bad. My father, the alpha, tried to force him on me, as well as my mother. It seemed I didn’t have a choice. They said it was the duty of the pack for the best to be passed on. I was being forced to submit to him. He called me beautiful every time he used me.” She said and looked away in shame.
“When I didn’t have cubs, he called me worthless, he said that I was a sorry excuse for a wolf and a female. He did this to me because I couldn’t give him a cub. Now whenever he tried to mate me, I would run and hide. The last time I did, my father followed me. He told me that a barren female has no place in the pack, and that if I went back he would kill me.” She sobbed.
“They killed your clan. That makes me one of them. That is
what flows through my veins. Killing!” She said and
began crying uncontrollably as I held her.
I began stroking her fur. “It’s alright… my blood is poisoned too… It’s easy to
tell I’m not really a wolf. But you… you aren’t a killer, you saved my life.
Just because you were born to Terror clan doesn’t mean you are one of them.
Killing is taught, not inherited. You a kind and
compassionate wolf with a gentle heart, nothing like Terror clan.” I
said as I hugged her close. “You’re not a worthless female. You’re the most
beautiful female I’ve seen. And I really doubt you’re barren.” I said as I
looked at her.
“Then how come I couldn’t give him a cub.” She whimpered.
“Well, maybe your hate for him made you not conceive, or maybe… he has the problem, not you.” I said and kissed her softly on the muzzle.
That night we slept together, not in that way, just next to each other. I felt something in the pit of my stomach as I looked at her. She was so beautiful, so sweet, and innocent…
My dreams were filled with images of her.
Several weeks later
My leg was severely scarred, but thanks to
After
“Silver, do you want to go for a walk?” She asked. When I had stepped in the trap it was mid-fall, and was now early winter. Even still it wasn’t all that cold yet.
“Sure.” I said as I grabbed a fur and draped it over her shoulder and did the same for myself, best be prepared.
The two of us walked through the forest together admiring the still colorful leaves that clung to the tree branches. “It really is beautiful isn’t it?” She said.
“Not nearly as beautiful as you.” I said and gave her a kiss on the cheek. She laughed a little and turned to kiss me on the muzzle. I was confused by the way she acted. She seemed to love being outside more then any wolf I’ve known.
“Silver, do you love me?” She asked. I knew I did but I hadn’t told her yet.
“Yes… I love you. I really and truly love you with all my heart.” I admitted and blushed a little. I wasn’t used to talking with anyone let alone being so open like this.
“I love you too.” She said and squeezed my arm.
“Well well, isn’t this a sweet sight.” A voice called from not far away.
A black wolf stepped out from around a tree. There had to be more not far off, wolves never traveled alone, unless they are rogues like Aurora and myself.
“Leave us alone.”
“You know this wolf?” I growled as I stared him down.
“…he’s the beta who did all those things to me.”
“Why would you ever want a worthless female like her? She can’t give you any cubs, she’s barren.” He grinned as two other wolves stepped out behind him.
“Actually from what I hear the problem is yours.” I laughed, “Considering the fact she’s carrying our first litter as it is, and I’m not even a pure wolf, as you can see. If a half-breed can have pups with such an ‘infertile’ female, what’s your excuse.” I could tell this was making him angry. I watched his two companions look at him a little funny. It was all a lie, but they wouldn’t know that.
“Hah, yeah right, the second I gave up on that dried up bitch I had a bunch of pups with other females.” He smiled confidently.
“Yeah, or when you chose them, they
ran off and mated with a different pack, or a rogue, just to give you a cub
because they’re so scared of what you did to
“Face it; you’re not a real male. You’re pathetic.” I snarled and threw my fur aside and took an offensive posture. My leg was still really shaky, and I hoped this wouldn’t come down to a fight.
“How dare you! I am Terror clan’s first beta! We’ll kill you!” He shouted. “Well what are you waiting for? Attack!” He growled and pushed the other wolves forward. They both stopped and turned to look at the beta wolf. “What are you doing!” He shouted at them.
“Now that he mentions it, none of your cubs really look like you.” The one on the right said.
“You really are impotent aren’t you? Pathetic! You accuse female who don’t know the trick of being barren! Do you have any idea how much damage your shame has done to the pack? You aren’t worth fighting for, and I think alpha will agree after we tell him.” They said as the walked away.
“Fine I’ll kill you myself!” He growled and rushed me.
As he rushed I ducked and pushed up under his arms, knocking his muzzle up, and I sank my teeth into the exposed neck. It was pure luck that my leg decided to weaken just then to make me duck.
His eyes dilated as I clenched down. I didn’t kill him, though I bloodied him so his pack knows he’s been neck bitten, and that shows that someone is stronger then them. “You’re blood is foul, and I will not poison myself with it. I’ll leave you to live with your shame. And remember this is our territory now!” I growled as he ran away.
I howled in triumph and turned back to
“Sorry I had to lie about you having pups, but did you see the look on his face.” I laughed.
“You know, it doesn’t have to be a lie. We could start a family together, just you and me.” She said and licked at my muzzle. “I’ll be in season really soon, so you’ll have to let me know.” She giggled and kissed me again.
“Yeah, let’s do it. Let’s start a family of our own. We’ll raise our pups with love in our hearts.” I said without hesitation and squeezed her tightly.
We returned to our cave, practically giddy. We tossed our furs onto the pile we used for our bed, and we both stood before each other as we were born into this world. She was gorgeous. I’m not sure how I compared to other males, but I prayed she felt the same way about me.
“You know, I’m not in season yet.” She said.
I nodded, “Practice makes perfect.” I joked and brought her close to me. We both knelt facing each other and I stopped. “Are you sure this is okay. I mean, you’re alright with this after what the beta did…”
She closed her paw around my muzzle. “Shh, it doesn’t matter. I didn’t love him. But I love and desire you.” She said and began licking at my muzzle. The little ministrations changed into something more as I did the same thing, and soon we were kissing as if the only air left was between our lungs.
This was all one lesson in life I didn’t receive from my pack as I should have when I reach the proper age, so I was thankful for my instincts. I watched get onto all fours and move her tail aside. I positioned myself over her and mounted her.
We moved together in a chorus of motion, flaring the passion
between us, until finally it all erupted into a glorious symphony of two songs
of ecstasy being howled out. And it is over,
We remained joined physically for a brief period as we lay together, but spiritually, we will be joined forever.
“I love you
“And if we keep this up, you’ll have a whole family to love. Maybe we can start a whole clan together.” She whispered into my ear.
“A family… the greatest gift I could get. I’ve been alone for so long. Thank you for coming into my life.” I said to her. Now that I think about it, that fox did me a favor. If it hadn’t tricked me, I never would have met her.
“Thank you for coming into my life as well, you healed my heart.” She said.
The two of us soon fell into a shallow sleep. We napped together. Soon we would wake up, and we would move on from there. Today starts my new life. I’ll still look for my mother. I want her to meet her grandchildren when they arrive.
This is my story, the heritage of the wolf. Family above all is the most precious thing, and to preserve it, and keep it pure, you must keep close the ones you love. If they are lost guide them in the night with a howl, and lead them back to the warmth, love, and softness of their home. If you can truly see this with an open heart then you will never need anything more.
They say every wolf must walk their own path. Mine has been hard and painful, but finally, I chose the right one. I am Silver the Half-wolf, wanderer and last surviving male of the Frostmoon clan. I lost my family, but now I’m building a new one. No matter how bad things get, I now know that I can recover. My dad was right, the spirit of the wolf is strong in me, because no matter who my true father was, my heart and soul is that of the pack runners.
I wish upon you a bountiful hunt, and may you find happiness among your own pack.
~Fin
This has been a story written by Eric B. aka Fixer SpeedStar. The characters of Silver and Aurora are \xA9 to me. To E-mail me, with [Questions/Commets/Feedback/Hatemail/ anything else] you can contact me at EricBac@optonline.net